


Lucy

by betsy_k



Series: Betsy's One Shots That Sometimes Turn Into Full Stories By Popular Demand [1]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Bathtubs, Crack, Grimmauld Place, I LOVE DRACO, One Shot, Time Travel, im so sorry, just read plz, like its really weird, lots of crack, sort of reader??, universe hopping, voldemort - Freeform, what
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-15
Updated: 2018-04-30
Packaged: 2018-09-24 16:19:45
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,447
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9770096
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/betsy_k/pseuds/betsy_k
Summary: What happens when reader wants to prank Lucius Malfoy??Read to find out...orIm sorry this makes no sense





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hi more one shots from me!  
> This was written in the summer when i was really make at Lucius Malfoy so...  
> Yeah...  
> its sort of confusing-its sort of about the reader? not from the readers point of view really,,,  
> ENJOY!

This is it. Our hero has accomplished her dream

Of annoying Lucius Malfoy. Yes, THE Lucius Malfoy.

Right now we see our hero (me, in case you haven't noticed, this is about me, but from an outsiders point of view) standing in a...

Bathtub.

Our hero wanders closer to said bathtub, and fills it up precisely 3/5 of the way.

"Perfect," she says, dipping her toe in.

Soon she is standing knee deep in the water.

It's cold water.

Precisely, cool.

But it's cold.

Our hero, shivering slightly, turns towards the constellation out the window, Sirius.

Yes, I know what your thinking.

You're thinking of Sirius. Sirius Black.

*CUE GASPS OF SHOCK, HORROR, AND MAYBE DELIGHT*

Well, this tidbit of information is actually important.

It will take our hero to Sirius Black's current residence.

Yes, you are correct.

Number 12, Grimmauld Place, Order of the Phoenix Headquarters, current residence of the (annoyed and restless) Sirius Black.

In case you are thinking *is this about our hero going to the HP universe? Isn't this set today? Isn't Sirius's residence at Grimmauld in 1995? *

You are correct, and you will find out more about that later.

Anyway, back to our hero.

She turns towards Sirius (the constellation), and whispers some carefully chosen words.

_"I solemnly swear that I am up to no good."_

Then our hero is whisked into the depths of time and universes.

LMLMLMLMLMLMLMLMLMLMLMLMLMLMLM

Y/N groans.

Has she done it?

Has she reached the HP Universe? And also gone back in time to 1995? (Told you).

She looks around.

Our hero has arrived through a Universe-Time-Portal into a dusty old attic.

She doesn't know if it is Grimmauld Place or not, but it is.

She just doesn't know that.

Our hero quickly gets up and dusts herself of, then quietly creeps down the stepladder of the Attic.

_Cr-e-e-e-a-a-a-k..._

Oh, dear.

"Who are you! Are you a Death Eater? WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN THIS DUM-Uh, my house!"

That was Sirius Black, in case you didn't understand.

Y/N looks wildly up at the man in front of her.

He has shoulder-length black hair, piercing, haunted gray eyes, and has a wand pointed at her face.

"Sirius! Mr. Black! Let-let me explain! Please! You can use Veritaserum on me if you like!"

Our hero cowers under Sirius's stare but looks up hopefully when he slowly lowers his wand.

"Okay, so, Sirius, you may not believe this but basically...I came from another universe just to annoy Lucius Malfoy and then return! That's all, I swear!"

You can just barely see the twinkle in Sirius's eye when she mentions pranking Malfoy, but his eyes harden.

"How can I believe you?"

Y/N thinks.

She can't tell him in her universe that he's part of a book series, because he'll ask her abut his fate...hmm...

"Um, you're friends at Hogwarts called you Padfoot, you _weren't_ the potter's Secret Keeper, that rat Pettigrew was, um, you uh, made the Marauders map," Our hero says quickly.

Padfoot looks up at her in shock.

"W-how...did you know that?"

Our hero knows that she can't reveal anything so she just says simply,

"Well, that's for me to know and you to find out. I'm Ari, by the way. So, can you help me prank Lucius?"

Sirius decides to trust her, and grins mischievously.

"Sure. What do you want to do?"

"Well, you see..."

LMLMLMLMLMLMLMLMLMLMLMLMLMLMLMLM

We now come to our hero and her Animagus friend, Sirius Black, escaped convict, Marauder, and prankster extraordinaire.

What are they doing, you ask?

Trying to set up a Floo connection to Malfoy Manor. (Sirius isn't coming)

You see, the wards around Malfoy Manor are so strong that you have to do some tricky ward-magic to be able to get through.

Right now, we see Sirius leafing through many Dark magic books on wards, while Y/N paces impatiently.

"Oh! Got it!"

"Really?" Our hero asks eagerly, and runs over to where Sirius has found a way to break the wards for 1 hour exactly.

"Perfect!"

LMLMLMLMLMLMLMLMLMLMLMLMLMLMLMLMLM

Y/N tumbles out of the fireplace in the living room of Malfoy Manor, clutching Peruvian Instant Darkness Powder, and a fake elder wand to scare them off. She is under the disillusionment charm that will wear off in approximately 2 minutes.

She can hear the Death Eater meeting going on in the next room, and so she quietly creeps in. Nobody notices the slight creaking of the dining room door, and so she is safe.

Then our hero turns towards the edge of the table and stifles a gasp.

Voldemort!

THE Voldemort!

The Dark Lord!

He-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named

You-Know-Who!

_Tom Marvolo Riddle_

I am Lord Voldemort!

Tommy Ole' Boy

AH!

This isn't one of her best moments. I mean, its VOLDEMORT! He is so creepy...and Dark... and pure _evil_ that she cant ever understand why her Baby Dray-Draco is anywhere _near_ his family or the Dark Lord!

But still, she must carry out her prank, then get back to Grimmauld, and return to her Universe and Time.

So she quietly creeps up behind Lucius Malfoy's chair, shivering when she passes behind Tom Riddle (what if he sees me? What if he _kills_ me!).

And then she carefully whispers into Malfoy's ear just as the disillusionment charm is wearing off,

" _Hi, Lucy,"_

Malfoy gives a pleasant, ear-splitting shriek and jumps out of his chair quickly.

Our hero knows what she has to do now.

Y/N quickly, (shaking with fear, because _Voldemort is right there, omigod, omigod_ ), jumps across the table to Draco, and kisses him on the lips, the slaps Voldemort in the face ( _omigod, omigod, omigod, am I gonna die?_ ).

Then she throws the Darkness Powder on the ground and everything is dark (except to her, of course).

She can hear furious cries of outrage, Tom's cries of,

"Who was that Mudblood brat? Where is she? Get her!"

Draco's cries of,

"Eugh! She kissed me!"

And Lucy's indignant cries of,

" _LUCY!_ "

She rushes out of the room, waving her Fake Elder Wand high in the air incase they see her, grabs some Floo Powder, and whispers into the fireplace (so they don't hear her),

" _Number 12, Grimmauld Place!"_

WHOOSH!

Our hero tumbles into the living room of Grimmauld Place, where Sirius is pacing anxiously, but stops when he sees her unharmed.

"Dear, God! What happened, Y/N? Tell me every detail!"

And so our hero told him.

"Lucy! Ahaha!"

"You _kissed_ him!?"

"No! You _didn't_!"

"Nice escape!"

And with that, Y/N told him that she had to say goodbye, and if he could not mention this to anyone, as it just wouldn't do.

"I really must be going, Padfoot. It was so nice meeting you," She says through her tears, hugging him fiercely.

"Take care of Harry, 'Kay?"

Sirius grins.

"Of course! Now, off you go!"

So our hero trudges up the stairs towards a bathroom, fills it up precisely 3/5of the way, steps in, shivering, and faces the Sirius constellation.

" _Mischief Managed."_

She whispers, and then our hero is sucked away towards home.

Voldemort never did find out who cause such a commotion during his meeting.

Sirius never really questioned how that mysterious girl got there, how she knew him, and why she wanted to kiss Draco Malfoy.

And he never told anyone what happened until he died later that year.

But he made sure to tell James and Lily, and Remus and Tonks when they came,

Over,

And over,

And over again.


	2. Stop Pondering Draco There's An Intruder

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yeah...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! Hello! Bonjour!   
> To anyone who actually reads this...  
> I hope you enjoy?? Somehow??

Her she is again.

Our hero, Y/N.

Once again, she stands at the edge of bathtub.

Once again, she fills it 3/5 of the way.

And once again, she steps into the cool water.

Why was she doing this? You ask.

You see, Y/N had done a brave thing, slapping Voldemort, calling Lucius Malfoy Lucy, and kissing Draco.

But she didn’t really mind the last part.

Y/N had been _obsessed_ with Draco Malfoy from the moment she read the HP books in 3rd grade.

After _finally_ getting to kiss Draco…

Well, she missed him.

Yes, I know.

Missed him? You ask. He’s a fictional character!

Well, true. But he is real in the HP universe.

Oh. You say. I understand.

So, after many weeks of contemplation, Y/N was back. And with a new goal.

_Talking to Draco Malfoy._

*GASP! ACTUALLY TALKING?!!? WHOA!*

You just read that and realized that that is the reaction that most people would have.

But Y/N isn’t any person.

_She is Officially Obsessed._

And when you’re Officially Obsessed, you can do anything.

Even Universe Hopping and Time Travel.

Now, don’t misread this. Y/N doesn’t have an obsession with how ‘ _bad_ ’ Draco is, and how ‘ _cool_ ’ it would be to be his girlfriend.

Nope.

Nein.

No.

Non.

Net.

Nie.

You get the point.

She likes Draco because of his flaws, yes. But she acknowledges that he isn’t perfect, and that he has made some bad choices.

BUT she also takes into the account that on the inside, he didn’t want to be a Death Eater, he was trained to be rude, and so on.

So now that we’ve got that all cleared up, back to Y/N.

She steps into the bathtub and faces towards a specific dragon-shaped constellation.

Well, here goes nothing.

She whispers,

_Draco dormiens nunquam titillandus._

And Y/N is whisked off to another Place, Time, and Universe.

Wow.

_Yet again._

 

Draco is irritated.

Annoyed.

Frazzled.

Bothered.

Irked.

You get the gist.

Some _idiot_ had interrupted a _Death Eater meeting._

And _kissed_ him!  
_Kissed!_

She could be a Mudblood!  
Euch!

But…

He is a curious person, and can’t help but wonder…

Who was she?

Why had she called Father ‘Lucy’?

Would he ever-

_No, Draco_

_Don’t think that_

So anyway, there he was, minding his own business while trying to be annoyed, when he heard a loud

_P_

_O_

     _P_

Draco doesn’t know what to do

Is that an elf?

Surely he would have heard them making _that_ loud of a noise when Dissaperating and Apperating before!  
But, of course, Draco is spending too much time pondering and not enough time doing- the source of the loud POP has now appeared beside him.

“Um, excuse me,” A voice says.

A suspiciously _familiar_ voice…

Draco whirls around.

Aha!  
It’s The Girl!

That KISSED HIM  
CALLED HIS FATHER LUCY  
AND SLAPPED THE DARK LORD

Shit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for getting this far and SORRY to anyone who was waiting and constantly checking to see if it was updated...  
> ha  
> ha  
> ha  
> like that happened...  
> ANYWHO there's prob more coming... ASAP!!  
> (by that i mean at least a week-sorry!)  
> <3 <3


	3. Fun-damental questions like whAT SHOULD I DO

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What should she say to explain to draco why tf she is there????
> 
> idk

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HI SORRY  
> i just am a very procrastinate-y person and i really like one shots because i know where to end things and if i continue things i just,, get confused and don't know if i should stop here and what i should have happen?? so I'm trying to make this a longer story but I'm really not good at it and prefer one shots but!!!! here we go!!!!

So where we last left off, The Girl had just come into Draco’s room.

Currently, they were facing each other and locked in a staring contest.

Draco took this time to look her over.

She had sparkling Y/E/C eyes and shiny Y/H/C hair. Her shirt said something he didn’t understand.

“GIRLS JUST WANT TO HAVE FUN-DAMENTAL RIGHTS”

What? He just did not understand this girl…

Suddenly the girl speaks.

“Draco…I’m sorry for kssing you without your permission,”

How

_Dare_

She?

Well, he supposes that its nice to apologize…

Hmmm.

“Okay. Thank you. I suppose- I suppose I accept your apology. Why have you returned?”

The girl frowns and takes a step back.

He wonders whats bothering her.

“Well, I just wanted to-to apologize, and y’know, maybe sorta meetharrypotter,” the girl spits out.

Now Draco is extremely confused.

“You what?”

“Well I was wondering if I could possibly meet some charac-people?”

Now Draco is suspicious.

“Well, like who?”

The girl looks excited.

“Well, could you possibly take me to Hogwarts! I’ve always wanted to—“

“Wait, I don’t even know you. Where do you come from? Why have you never been to Hogwarts before? How do you keep _getting_ here?!”

 

Y/N doesn’t know what to do.

How on Earth could she answer Draco’s question?

‘Hi I’m Y/N and I’m from another dimension where you, your father, and everyone you know is fictional?”

No, she doesn’t think so.

She needs to think fast because Draco is getting impatient and-

OOOOOH  
Yes!  
The perfect-the _best_ idea has come to Y/N.

A perfect way to freak out Draco! And get to spend time with him! And meet Harry and Hermione and Ron and-

Ok. Here we go.

What could she be about to say? You ask, confused

Oh trust me, it’s not going to work. Siriusly…

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“I’m your fairy godmother?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yeah... more in like either a month or about 15 minutes
> 
> we'll see what happens


	4. I don't even KNOW

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Um...godmothers, fairy godmtohers, are a thing in wizarding britain!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hehehe sorrrrrrry y'all! I just was watching captain america and decided to simultaneously check out this account ann. I found this?? heres to anyone that wants this?! :) :) :)

 

Draco is, to say the least, shocked

Of course muggles believed that ‘fairy godmothers’ were a fictitious idea

But SMART people in the wizarding world knew that they were rare, but true.

The girl is looking at him with such a… strangely Sirius expression that he can’t help but believe his fairy godmother.

“Wow! Really?” He says, hardly containing his excitement.

The Girl nods and comes to sit down on his bed.

“Come here, young one…” she says, patting the space next to her.

Draco is not one to turn down his fairy godmother of all people, and obliges.

“Now, uh, I am from another, universe! Yes. Universe. But I am still your fairy godmother, and I have come to like check out your life!” She says, smiling oddly.

“Brilliant!” Draco says, now a completely different kid from a few minutes ago.

“Lets go, then!”

 

Y/N is shocked.

How is this even working?

How is…

The concept of ‘fairy godmother’ even a thing here?

And does he think that she can fly or some shit?

What even…

Well, never look a face in the gift horse!

Hmm. Maybe that’s not how that saying goes.

AnywhooO, Y/N decides to keep up the act and convinces Draco ( _draco. Malfoy. DRACO BLOODY MALFOY!??!)_ to take her to…

HOGWARTS!  
HOGGGGGGWARTS!  
Draco is standing up now, saying something…but she cant even focus on the words coming pompously out of his mouth.

HOGWARTS

“Uh, excuse me, fairy godmother? Did you hear what I said?” He says, excited yet disdainfully.

“What? Uh, yeah no, can you repeat what you said? Um, darling?”

Draco’s eyes are shining with barely concealed excitement as his says.

“Well, I just thought that you might like to change into something more…” he trails off awkwardly.

“Normal? Sure! Um…”

SHIT! She cant? Do? Magic?

“Well, I can, but you can’t watch me. So, shoo! Ill be ready in no time, um…child,”

Draco scurries out and Y/N sighs, then turns her shirt around so the words are on the back, picks up a sharp-looking knife and cuts her pants to make them a little more fashionable and… Capri-y, and grabs a cloak from Draco’s closet!  
Voila! Beautiful! Wonderful! Perfect! You might be thinking.

But…Y/N looks like a child in a badly-put-together Halloween costume.

No Matter!!!!  
SHES OFF TO HOGWARTS!

**Author's Note:**

> Yeah...! Sorry  
> Thanks for reading if you did though


End file.
